How to Stand Your Ground (In an Argument, Not with a Gun)

Get grounded

What does it mean to “stand your ground?”

You know what it means intuitively. But is there something more to it?

Yes, there is. Because being “grounded” is a real thing. And being able to stand your ground is directly related to being “grounded” as a person.

Without being “grounded,” you won’t be able to maintain your mental focus in an intensely emotional state. And you are not going to be fully oriented to the “here-and-now” of the moment you are in. You will be unfocused and unable to stand your ground.

What happens if you can’t stand your ground

We know from electricity that excess energy in a charged system can cause an overload and shut down. It can also cause a buildup that can “spark” at any time. Without a “ground” it could start a fire, or kill someone. It’s the same inside you.

When things get “heated,” you don’t want to yell or get physical. You don’t want to do or say something “stupid.” And you don’t want to give people an excuse to avoid the point you’re making because you’re “causing a scene.”

Stand your ground, make your point, and win the argument without losing credibility or getting arrested.

Maintaining mental focus in the face of an intensely emotional state is not a skill that comes without practice. Which means that you’ll want to build your capacity to do so through the mindful practice of “grounding.”

In bioenergetics, we practice “grounding” by standing in the “grounding pose.” This is accomplished by standing with feet shoulder-width apart, toes pointing straight forward. Bend forward at the waist and hang the torso toward the ground. Let the head be heavy like a bowling ball and the arms hang like noodles. Keep the knees slightly bent so they are not locked out, and push the bum toward the sky.

The longer you can stand in this pose, the longer you can stand your ground. The better you can maintain your mental focus in an intensely emotional state.

I know it seems too simple to be true. But just try standing in this pose for 5 minutes. The physical and emotional pain that you will have to endure can become tremendous (unless you’re a yogi). This will translate directly to your ability to stand your ground in difficult emotional situations in life.

Don’t take my word for it, though. Give it a try and let me know how it goes.

Or, give me a call. We’ll talk, and I’ll teach you other techniques to improve your capacity to stand your ground.

Emotional Utopia, the book by Leah Benson, LMHC

Contact me now to set up your free 15-minute phone consultation.

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